dae-mizu

i’m on m/c today.doc advised me to stay at home take care of my lovely baby…he got allergy conjunctivitis i guess.jangkit from one of the baby yang suka sangat kat aku and afzal.i noticed this from the very first day aku hantar afzal ke nursery.time tu aku nak breastfeed him and these 2 babies which are actually toddler dah pun…dah bleh jalan2…suka sngat dok cuit aku and afzal.tengok my …… while im breastfeeding my boy.maybe pelik kot tgok ape yang afzal buat ni since diorg tak breastfeed (what her pengasuh told me lah…).everytime aku gi breastfeed they will come near me when got a chance.aku pun layan la…peliknya, i’m not the only person yg breastfeeding my boy.there were other mamas tapi why on earth diorg dtg kat kitorg?? no answer…the only thing i know, my boy dah 2 kali jangkit ngan diorg ni…last 2 weeks, one of them selsema, then cuit afzal and bagi afzal their toys (in front of me).they were actually being nice.it’s ok…but,the next day, afzal terus je kena selsema….hmm it took 2 weeks to get him ubat yg berkesan….i’m not blaming those toddlers…they’re cute and nice….la ni…last thursday, one of them kena sakit mata datang tengok aku perah susu.that time afzal tgah tido so, i took that chance to pump some for him when he’s wake up.that cute toddler datang main with afzal’s bottle,pump and even my name tag.ermm…guess what happen on friday morning, mata afzal berair2…aku ingat dia lepas nangis…tapi bila dia tidor, dia mesti merengek2 sebab tak bleh buka mata bcoz of so many taik mata kat mata dia.from friday to monday, ingatkan tak serious tapi on monday nite, dia dah panas2 badan.merengek2 tak abis2…terus me n my husband took him to the children’s clinic and doc told me not to hantar afzal to nursery for some time.he give me m/c and here i’m.baru je bagi makan, makan ubat and tidorkan bambam mama….bambam ni, walaupun demam and sakit mata, aktifnya macam tak sakit…tapi malam merengek je..lembik je….tapi bila dah makan ubat n antibiotik i think he’s got better now.

tapi tu semua tak melemahkan semangat aku…since jadi mama, i feel strong and tabah (hehe). thinking that he need me and my husband also need me, i must strong….jaga anak yang tgah tak sihat pun satu latihan untuk kita jadi kuatkan?

hmm….tengahari tadi, aku pegi tengok afzal kat nursery.dia baru je tidur.so, takde la aku nak kacau dia.dia selsema…semalam dah baik.maybe sebab dia tido tak pakai seluar…malam tadi dia berpeluh2.so, mama dia ni yang bijak dah buka seluar dia..lagipun itu la hobi dia tido dengan pampers and baju je…dah pagi ni tengok2 selsema balik…hmmm…..tak sangka anak teruna mama ni dah nak masuk 6 bulan.tadi masa aku pegi nak breastfeed dia, dia tengah tido.so, aku pun pam je le susu…terperasan plak aku rupa2nya dah nak masuk 6 bulan aku breastfeed dia. happy sangat when i finally achieved my target to breastfeed him at least 6 months.but since my breastmilk still banyak i think i’m gonna continue breastfeed him.alhamdulillah, dia ni senang nak dijaga.setakat demam kena injection tu ada la, tapi demam panas so far belum lagi and i pray to Allah SWT hoping that he is always strong and healthy. maybe that is the benefit of breastfeeding. he got the best vitamin, the freshest ones. kalau diikutkan memang payah nak breasfeed ni.the first day of his life, his mama ni ceaser after waiting 12 hours with poor progress.so weak with no food just water…so nurse dah ajar dia minum formulated milk.so, when im strong enough to take him from babies room, i tried to breastfeed him…masa tu memang excited sgt nak jadi mama.so nak la breastfeed dia.tapi dia tanak sebab susu tanak kuar.so dok la melalak.nyaring plak tu.baby lain sume ikut nangis.so, aku pun bagi la susu yang ada kat ward.sampai kena marah ngan nurse sebab bagi susu formula instead of breastfeeding him.nak buat macamana….aku tak sabar nak balik rumah.sampai rumah terus mintak hubby panggilkan tukang urut.nak urut breast so that my breastmilk ada banyak.after much pain and tears i finally did it! the 5th day, afzal dapat menyusu dengan jayanya..tapi afzal ni ikut mama dia kuat makan so, asyik la tak cukup susu walaupun banyak.so, nak taknak campur la denagn susu formula. but he prefer mine of course.just to make sure he’s not hungry…meaning that cuma 2-4Oz je setiap hari.just to top up my breastfeeding.but now since he is in PPUKM’s nursery, it’s much more convenient for me to fully breastfeeding the whole day.cuma skang dia dah pandai makan.masa dia 3 bulan, just introduce him cereal tapi nurse marah takut dia sakit.so, i stopped immediately.sian sebab dia pantang tgok mama dia makan nanti dia mengunyah2 mulut dia.so, cukup 5 months 2 weeks, i start giving him solid food back and he is much2 happy….he gain ideal weight now and of course dia makin lonjong…huhuhu….still i never think of stop breastfeeding him yet.it’s the most wonderful time that i treasure most is the moment he look straight in my eyes while sucking the milk and smile when he’s done. this is what we call ‘bonding’ my friends…..he will love u more and more……

it’s been a while aku tak buka this blog since dah bertitle Mrs nih.now, i’m in my room baru je selesai menjual tudung2 yang cantik2 kat staff O&G yang best! not much things to do today. i can say friday is the best time for me to take a deep breath and relax my muscle waiting for the coming monday which is known as the busiest day in our clinic. but…i love my job…meeting new people everyday and have some brief talk with them while performing the ultrasound and the sweetest thing is to break the news they wanted to hear most-it’s a boy! or it’s a gurl! ;D love to see their face!!

hmm..tgah mlm nih aku takde apa nak buat.nak do pun susah sbab baru minum kopi kaw..anak n hubby dh tdo nyenyak..seronok bila fikirkan hidup ni dh sampai tahap ni.seronok bila dah bergelar mama…ada anak yang comel n bambam….dh nak masuk 3 bulan pun..sedar tak sedar baby dah nak besar…ikut saiz memang dah besar..hehe…teringat the moment perut kena belah..ngilu!!! tapi disebabkan excited nak tengok anak, mata ni tak lepas2 curi2 tengok kat lampu OT.nampak sebijik2 macam mana perut kena belah sampai la doc keluarkan baby..masa tu, Tuhan je yang tau betapa happynya hati.saat tu rasa macam nak lompat dari meja OT and terkam peluk anak walaupun perut masih lagi terbelah…itu la persaan setiap ibu agaknya.masa doc jahit balik luka tu, aku rasa macam gelisah sebab bg aku lambatnyee proses nak tutup perut aku tu…aku nak sgt tenangkan anak aku yg tengah nangis tu.dah la kuat sayu plak nangis…tapi keluar OT dh pkul 10mlm.so aku tak dpt tengok baby smpai la pkul 3pg..aku bangun and dengar anak aku nangis.aku mintak nurse hantarkan baby kat aku.aku peluk and baca 3 Qul.then dia tidor ngan lena sampai la masa die nak menyusu aku tgah mamai, nurse dtg amik balik.aku tak puas lagi.esoknya pkul 7pg, aku mintak nurse trunkan katil aku.so, aku bleh trun.aku lupa ceaser sakit.aku terus bangun, n nak pegi toilet.mas tu aku rasa Ya Allah! sakit mcam tak bleh berjalan.tapi aku kuatkan semangat.then aku pi amik anak aku.sorong slow2 ke katil aku.aku belek muka dia, tengok jari2 dia…cium dia byk2 kali.at last, aku ada baby of my own!! alhamdulillah….pkul 9pg aku sorong plak anak utk mandi.menjerit kuat tapi sekejap je maybe sb terkejut.then aku peluk n tdo sampai ayahnye datang…..

Rossa - Ayat-Ayat Cinta

desir pasir di padang tandus
segersang pemikiran hati
terkisah ku di antara cinta yang rumit

bila keyakinanku datang
kasih bukan sekadar cinta
pengorbanan cinta yang agung
ku pertaruhkan

reff:
maafkan bila ku tak sempurna
cinta ini tak mungkin ku cegah
ayat-ayat cinta bercerita
cintaku padamu
bila bahagia mulai menyentuh
seakan ku bisa hidup lebih lama
namun harus ku tinggalkan cinta
ketika ku bersujud

bila keyakinanku datang
kasih bukan sekedar cinta
pengorbanan cinta yang agung
ku pertaruhkan

repeat reff

ketika ku bersujud

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alhamdulillah awal muharram is coming! i had a wonderful year before  and hoping for another wonderful years to come .all the bitter moments are sweet after we’ve been through…that’s the beauty of life, learning through the experiences…bad or good…
it’s been a long time since i last posted my blog.i was just thinking about how good is GOD to me. Everytime i face any problem, He will repay me with good news. that’s why i said last year was a wonderful year.i never want to reminisce  the bitter moment i had before.i just want to set in my mind, i had the best moment and hoping for another best moment.maybe better than the best?? i always put myself in positive ways of thinking after been struggling to get myself out of every single problem any human being faces in every single second in their life. it is easy to say that i was fated this way and that way, but are we dare enough to get ourselves out of it? that is always the best question i ask myself. i was growing up as a kid who love to ask why.although i’m  a happy go lucky girl, i have a critical thinking kind of person inside.i always ask why GOD give me this or that, why am i have to live like this and so on….but, everytime, GOD give me something that i will feel ashame of myself.feel ashame of what i’ve been asking or criticising and later i found myself learning to  grow up.to be mature to  see beyond our eyes can see.days by days, i never ask that kind of question anymore as i will feel ashame of myself because i know GOD is always listening what we’ve been praying for.just pray to HIM and he’ll listen to me and help me.but when there is no help it’s not that GOD is not listening to me.but He thinks that i’m not ready for it, and the time will come.insyaAllah….

this month is the busiest month ever for me…never been this busy before…my sis’s wedding was a huge responsibility to all my family members after almost 18 years we had the first wedding of my eldest sis…well, the preparation was quite kelam kabut…with only  one month, we had to make sure all the things are ready…i had to prepare for her bunga telur and souvenirs…thank god i ‘ve been given a golden hand..hehehe…so, in one month time i settled all the things.. the responsible really gave me a shock…i was so stress the whole month and fortunately, after the memorable day, i suddenly felt really calm, and relax..maybe because the day was a success to all of us..we were so happy  to see all my late father’s relatives and friends were there, sharing the happy day with us…but the fatigue never leave my body yet..still need more energy to trigger me to work…today i’m working…i have to forget my annual leaves as i need to settle some urgent cases in my pocket…it’s quite a big responsibility for me because i’m dealing with special kids with edward syndrome, william syndrome and ambiguous gen baby…so, just forget about the beaches in front of my house and drive to kl to finish the job!!

but i’m happy with it.seriously in happy with my job..i love my job so much that i feel so energetic to do my work although my body alarm is ringing for a charge…

ermm..lama plak tak ngetuk keyboard utk blog nih..dua hari ni aku blur + boring + ngantuk…ntah la..and dua hari ni jugak aku tak turun lab..sure prof piss off kalau tau aku takturun lab..nasibla supplier dtg antar profile.if not, kira keje gaji bute la dua hari nih..i dunno, macam ada something stuck in my head…pasal ape??ntah la…maybe sebab penat…yeah…my last weekend full of ‘open houses’…helping my sis with her wedding preparation and…stucked in jam!! ( so, the "open houses" turn out to be only "open house"- i only managed to go only one! sad but true…)! yesterday, i thought maybe bcause of monday blues..but, i never have monday blues..i always love monday…i have no problem waking up early in the morning and drive to work on monday..but this week is different…totally different when the blues continue to tuesday and hopefully it didnt continue to wed and the rest of the week..i hate this! seriously..i hate when i’m not happy and energetic as usual…i feel slow, weak and lazy..feels like the world is moving too slow and i’m slower than it….i could be slower than the old printer, i could be weaker than nenek-nenek tua and i could be as lazy as..?? ermph? no idea…so, guys? what say you? am i affected with virus? or worm? gosh! i need a reformation!!!

Better Than I Was
More Than I Am
All Of That Happened
By Takin’ Your Hand
Who I Am Now
Is Who I’Ve Wanted To Be
Now That We’Re Together
Stronger Than Ever, Happy And Free

It’S A Beautiful Thing
Don’T Think I Can Keep It All In
And If You Ask Me Why I’Ll Change
All I Gotta Do Is Say Your Sweet Name

It’S Your Love
Just Does Somethin’ To Me
Sends A Shock Right Through Me
Can’T Get Enough
So If You Wonder
About The Spell I’M Under
It’S Your Love…..